Thanks for all the great (and frightening) UNIVERSE DEAL ideas! They really got my deal-making juices a-flowing. And, after much deliberation and nail-biting and mulling over, I have settled on a UNIVERSE DEAL.
Jade came up with the most shudder-inducing DEAL idea (no clue why I feel the need to capitalize UNIVERSE DEAL every time I type it. It's just THAT IMPORTANT, I guess. UNIVERSE, I MEAN BUSINESS):
"You could act for a pirate for the day, clothes, arghhhs and all. But. You'd have to leave the house and associate with people. And. You couldn't start every interaction with "I'm doing this because I got a book deal." You'd need to channel the pirate."
Right? That sounds like a DEAL that would guarantee the Universe to come through on its end. But I don't think I have the resolve/commitment/confidence/ability-to-ignore-quizzical-expressions that would be necessary to be a pirate for an entire day. That, and I work a lot, and piratic apparel/slang is not something the company would approve of. (I know -- why am I working for a company that doesn't approve of piratic apparel/slang? The sacrifices we make...)
So, I have a compromise.
My UNIVERSE DEAL, now and forevermore:
I, Sara Raasch, blogger, writer, and dreamer extraordinaire, do so solemnly swear that if the UNIVERSE comes through and gets me a book deal, I will get my ears re-pierced.
Now, I know what you're thinking.
But let me explain a few things.
1) I got my ears pierced when I was...13? ish? And I never, ever, ever remembered to wear earrings, and they grew over, and I wasn't the least bit saddened by this. I'm not a huge jewelry person. It didn't break my heart.
2) I have a phobia of needles (says the girl with two tattoos...). No, seriously -- when my sister got her ears pierced, I had to leave the store. When I get IVs, I go into trance-coma-mode and can't speak/move/acknowledge-anyone's-existence until the damn TUBE is out of my VEIN. *shudder*
3) I really, really, REALLY dislike having to do things that aren't extremely necessary and/or things I want to do. I'm very low-maintenance. Thus, earrings and ear-piercing upkeep would be something quite annoying for me to deal with.
Thus, getting my ears re-pierced would be a huge sacrifice for me, both physically and time-consumingly.
Okay, well, not a HUGE sacrifice. But lets face it -- the Universe getting me a book deal wouldn't be a HUGE sacrifice either. Not like ending poverty or anything.
Does that sound like a DEAL, Universe? Let's shake on it.
All right. I feel good about this.
In other news: Hey, I finished another ms today. No big deal or anything.
In case you haven't been keeping track (lord knows my obsessive-compulsive inability to let things go has been keeping track enough for the both of us...), this is the first novel I've finished since Stream Pirate, back in 2009. 2009! And not even late 2009 -- I finished Stream Pirate last last winter-ish. It's been around a year since I had the warm, ethereal glow of completing a new and totally god-awful manuscript.
But you know what? I'm in love with it, suckiness and all. We'll see how long that love lasts when I sit down for a read-through later this week.
Excuse me while I rejoice in my productivity and let the Universe mull over this DEAL. You know you want to see the heart-wrenching agony I'll go through in getting my ears pierced, Universe. You know you want to.