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Tuesday, August 10, 2010

When Good Characters Go...Good-er

The following conversation was transcribed by an anonymous bystander on August 9, 2010. Names were changed to protect the identities of the participants, but the anonymous bystander, who apparently suffered numerous psychological and emotional strains from having to listen to this conversation firsthand, urged the real names to be used under the claim that "the participants deserve to have their insanity proclaimed to the world. Idiots."

Sara: Nothing. Nothing. Nothing. I can do nothing.

*crosses legs*

*curls fingers into little o's*

Sara: Ommmm

*opens eye a crack*

*notices people watching*

*closes eye*

Sara: OMMMMMM

Ambition: Hey. Look at this.

Sara: OM. OM. OMOMOMOMOM. Mom? No. Focus. OMMMMMM.

Ambition: YOU REALLY NEED TO SEE THIS. And I have a friend who wants to talk to you too. He misses you. I'll bring him in.

Sara: *peeks again*

*notices Ambition is gone for the moment*

*clicks link he left*

Sara: Damn.

Ambition: *returns* Here he is. I'll leave you two to chat. Oh, I see you opened the link I left? Thought you might like that. Why didn't you think of doing something like that YEARS ago? Oh, well. At least you found it now. You might like some of the jobs posted on August 2 or 3. Just saying.

Sara: DAMN. *curls fingers again* DAMMMMMN. I like that mantra better.

Ambition: Leaving now. TALK TO MY FRIEND. He misses you. I think you two can have an enlightening chat. *leaves*

Sara: *eyes new arrival* Oh. YOU again. What do YOU want?

Max: *sits next to Sara*

*tries to sit yoga-cross-legged*

*falls over*

*sits up*

Max: Hi. Um. I was hoping we could-- talk.

Sara: We did talk. More than SEVEN THOUSAND words of "talk." And it all SUCKED. Sucked, sucked, sucked. What more could you possibly have to say to me? Want to suck for EIGHT THOUSAND words? NINE? When does it END?

*closes eyes*

Sara: Ommmmm.

Max: I know, I know. I've been really difficult lately. And I don't deserve a second chance.

Sara: Second? More like fifteenth.

Max: I'm sorry. But I've changed. I've had a lot of time to think, and I'm ready. I'm ready to commit to my story.

Sara: *opens one eye* You're-- committing?

Max: I am. I'm ready to get this car on the road.

Sara: Show. Show on the road.

Max: Why would there be a show on a road? That sounds dangerous.

Sara: No, it's not actually ON the road, it's-- *gives up* So what are you proposing, then? I should open your document again and it will all magically not suck? You can't just UNDO seven thousand words of SUCK. It doesn't work like that.

Max: I know. Which is why I think we should...start over.

Sara: *opens both eyes*

*glares at Max*

*closes eyes*

*counts to three*

*opens eyes again*

Sara: START OVER?!

Max: Just hear me out!

Sara: I've been harping on you for MONTHS about what your story is about and where it's going and why it isn't working and all this time you've been telling me the WRONG STORY??

Max: Yes.

Sara: *speechless*

Max: But this one is good. REALLY good. And I'll let you have a pirate or two.

Sara: *starts to get up*

*hears the word "pirate"*

*sits*

Sara: I'm listening.

4 comments:

Sara {Rhapsody and Chaos} said...

ooooo pirates =) Yay for the good story finally shining through!!

Adam Heine said...

Also listening...

Dara said...

Sometimes it takes a character telling you the story's wrong...I know how that is, believe me, Naomi wouldn't leave me alone until I fixed it. :P Although she likes to be difficult. Still.

Anyway, yay for new beginnings! And also for that freelance writing site--I may have to check that out later (my work computer isn't playing nice with the website for some reason).

Tahereh said...

hahaha you're too cute!